Another new poem

This was a difficult one to write, for some reason.

words tumble around me like stones
they shouldn’t hurt but they do
words slice like icy winter winds
and suddenly i’m cold
each time someone calls me the wrong name
calls me sir calls me ma’am
it’s a pinprick to my heart
a tiny wound to my soul
peeling away my sense of self
the rightness of being me
trying to put me back into your box
chipping away at my personhood
grinding me down by degrees
and i have to put myself back together
reattach the fragments
and i am so very tired
weary of fighting my way through the world
struggling to be seen
fighting to remain myself
trying to become me
a moment a minute a fragment
at a time
life’s harder without a template
it’s not easy being free
but i can’t put the contents back in the original packaging
i just don’t fit any more
i spilled out of the box all over the floor
and there’s no cleaning me up
i am indelible
and i exist
here i am
in front of you
i am here
outside your binaries boundaries and boxes
and i’m not going anywhere

© bardofupton 2018

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